Mike visits Andrew’s apartment, which is full of stacks of books and boxes of records. Andrew also has lists tacked on the wall, which include: “Places to go: Solomon Islands, Dublin, Aruba, Patagonia. Bucket list: Space travel. Adopt children. Finnegan’s Wake. Values: Gratitude. Curiosity. Empathy” (247).

When Mike tells Andrew that he is an aspiring writing and topiary artist, Andrew enthusiastically encourages Mike to pursue those goals, even though Mike says he’s just a “wannabe:” “Well, isn’t that where everybody starts? C’mon, no limits, no excuses. Get after it, Michael. Fake it till you make it. You can do anything you want” (248).

Mike and Andrew protest outside a pet store that gets its dogs from a puppy mill. Andrew is disappointed when no other protesters show up for the event. Andrew tells the gruesome story of puppy mills to a little girl that they see: “Some puppy mills,” he explained, “are littered with piles of dead, partially eaten dogs, stuffed in corners and hanging from rafters. And in some puppy mills, starving adult dogs eat their newborn puppies” (255). The little girl screams hysterically after hearing this information.

Andrew becomes depressed and tells Mike: “I’m a phony.